growsomethinggood ()

If you’re in the US, you may also want to look into FMLA leave. Certain states also have programs that stopgap poor employer parental leave coverage. Definitely see what is available to you!

Hi! Not strictly a lesbian here but in a lesbian relationship. Yes, lesbians have top/bottom dynamics typically in the “one doing the action” vs the “one being acted upon” across various different acts. Most switch it up (“vers”), rather than identifying primarily as tops or bottoms. If you are strictly a top or strictly a bottom, you’re described as “stone” as in “stone top” or “stone bottom”.

Very important that these are completely different roles than dominant/submissive/switch, which are BDSM terms and describe a more psychological aspect of a relationship than the more physical top/bottom/vers.

Look, folks in the US are extremely on edge about this election (that’s both currently happening through early voting and the last day possible within 2 weeks), and in particular, foreign interference/propaganda. There’s a lot of crap we’re getting from every angle under the sun trying to get “the right people” to vote and “the wrong people” to stay at home, depending on the political inclination. It’s exhausting and we’re having a bad time. We know shit sucks here and we are trying our hardest to not descend further into fascism with a guy who literally admires Hitler. If we get some lightly progressive policies out of it, that’s great. By pushing some “both parties suck” propaganda in this eleventh hour, everyone is going to dog pile you because we’re sick of this so much.

Thank you lol

I am noting that OP didn’t respond here, mayhaps they enjoy critiquing political circumstances they can’t contribute to more than addressing their own? 🤔

And they edited the post to something innocuous! For anyone coming in late, the original was what u/Prunebutt here said but with US politics instead.

Bruh you’re not even US American, get outta here with this defeatist crap. Don’t you have your own right wing surge to fight in Germany?

So, Gattica?

Meanwhile, everyone on tumblr is relieved that Matt has something to distract him from harassing trans women for existing

Excellent points! There are definitely workarounds, but you have to look at what state options are available to you to make a plan that works for your situation. Some communities have trans advocates who can walk folks through that process for free, anyone looking to update their documents should see what resources are available.

Not for your birth certificate, no. That is fully in the hands of wherever you were born and can’t change. Your driver’s license/ID depends on your place of residence but you still would have to transfer a legal license from one state to another while moving, which can require several documents to prove you are who you say you are and live where you say you live. But that’s really state specific!

That sadly doesn’t help trans people who were born in Alabama and already left, since that’s where their birth certificate would still fall under. Or if they got their license in Alabama, they may have trouble transferring it to their current state if their documents don’t match up.

Oh, I completely understand you’re correct here, I’m just, so, so tired of fighting to keep all the sociopolitical gains of the past 10-50 years, y’know? I know they have a lot going on, it just feels shitty considering the rest of the political climate.

Sigh, ACLU, is this really that high a priority in the list of rights we need to fight for right now? Really?

Also, am I missing something, or wouldn’t these arguments fall apart under the lens of slander? If you make a sufficiently convincing AI replica that is indistinguishable from reality of someone’s face and/or voice, and use it to say untrue things about them, how is that speech materially different from directly saying “So-and-so said x” when they didn’t? Or worse, making videos of them doing something terrible, or out of character, or even mundane? If that is speech sufficient to be potentially covered by the first amendment, it is slander imo. Even parody has to be somewhat distinct from reality to not be slander/libel, why would this be different?

Hello! I am a cis person who is close to the trans community. I’m happy to try to answer your questions a bit.

Question 1: Gender is a many faceted beast, but for now, let’s focus on two aspects: gender as one feels internally, and gender as outwardly expressed/perceived by others. An easy way to describe the trans experience to cis people is through internal gender, knowing that you are something other than your gender assigned at birth, turning into an externalized gender expression; wearing the right clothes, the right hair length, etc. However, not every trans person is going neatly from one gender box to another. Maybe they like a few certain things picked up from their assigned gender, maybe they’re nonbinary, maybe they’re gender non-conforming (think of feminine gay men and butch lesbians for examples of cis people like that). Trans people deserve to have at least as much range of gender expression as that! The reason you might not see a lot of people with conflicting gender expressions and gender identity, is, well, these folks don’t have to come out to everyone they meet. If you assume someone is a man and they’re not, often they won’t correct you.

Question 2: Previously (and similarly to homosexuality), being trans was categorized as a mental illness, but doctors took a closer look and found that was incorrect at least a decade ago in the 2013 update to DSM-5. Now, gender dysphoria (the diagnosis most trans people get) is described as an incongruence between the mind and body. Consider your limb example in the reverse: if someone were missing an arm and complained of feeling a phantom limb, you’d understand that to be an incongruence between the mind (expecting a limb) and the body (missing a limb). Most trans people are experiencing something like that, a desire for something positive (experiences of a “true”, or preferred, gender) rather than just something negative (removing the experiences of the gender assigned at birth). The best treatment for trans people’s mental health is to have a well-supported transition.

Not a question, but in regard to your intro, you don’t have to worry so much about pronouns, rarely are people going to get pissed at you for an honest mistake. Other people using the correct pronoun for trans people (even if it’s after correcting) can be very validating. As long as you’re trying and listening to feedback (like, not repeatedly using the wrong pronouns for someone who told you otherwise), you’re doing just fine, no need to be anxious over it!

Also, if you want to learn more in a casual setting, trans memes are 🔥, keep an eye on some of the communities around here!

Anyone thinking that lemmy is a welcoming space to women should read through that thread first.

Edit: the current state of Lemmy and the fediverse reminds me heavily of early reddit, for better and for worse. You can curate some pretty supportive communities if you are careful picking them out, they remain well moderated, etc. But there are plenty of places where you’ll get scummy content if you wander or if posts attract too much attention.

They’ve actually slightly improved this lately, they ask about what they determine are risky sexual behaviors (ie hookups) with no gender attached now. The one thing is that you can’t be actively taking PrEP and donate because it would obscure the HIV testing results (that they ought to be doing every time, multiple times!).

Source: https://www.redcrossblood.org/donate-blood/how-to-donate/eligibility-requirements/lgbtq-donors.html

Not to discourage usage of OSM at all, but you can absolutely download offline maps on mobile with Google Maps, they’ve just hidden it a bit. If you tap your account icon in the upper right, a menu pops up that includes offline maps, and it’ll let you select boundaries to download.

It also normalizes the practice, the more people do it for just that shiny checkmark. Unless you are legit a public figure who could be impersonated, it’s actively detrimental to everyone else’s privacy to get verified.

Good news! Artists have already covered this one, please enjoy The Bone Game by Drawfee

Add SmartTube for androidTV and you’re set!

I use Blockada 5 and haven’t noticed any heating issues, it might be worth a go! I did have to enable most of the lists to get good coverage (and then a couple custom selected on/off over time) but I mostly don’t think about it after a little setup. The only thing I do have to worry about is swapping which VPN is on when I want a real VPN- but fortunately the VPN I like (Mullvad) has adblock built in too.