“Fuck that particular con, I have a president in my pocket now.”

Which oune wold yo souggest?

*Hannibal Lecter

“Go on, eat me. See what happens.”

“I’ll digest you!”

“Frank, this is the third time this week. Just admit you’re into it.”

Sure, you go and “curate” and put only half of the donation in the exhibition area and it’s “fine” but when my zoo gets a panda on loan and I decide to do the same, everybody’s all mad all of a sudden.

At least they can finally admit that they are not a car company.

Eh, just throw them over your shoulder and you’re good to go.

Rüde.

*Morgen

Potayto, potahto, all depends on which reality you choose to inhabit.

These are called schools and universities and whatnot.

Honestly, if your goals include conserving an inhabitable environment for the human race in the future, conserving a semblance of wealth for everyone but the top, like, dozen people on Earth, conserving the rights of workers and consumers against an overwhelming opposition, conserving democracy for future generations (and all that against the best efforts of a supposedly “conservative” party), your parents may have been right.

Alternative suggestion: spray paint your resume on the outside wall of the offices of whatever company you are trying to apply at. Bonus points if you manage an approximate rendition of Comic Sans throughout.

Trump sues mirror for making him look ugly.

“Wouldn’t it be great if everybody gave my AI company money?”

“For doing what?”

“… I don’t follow.”

Also known for inventing the phrase “lend me your ear”.

Sacre bleu! It’s almost like the free speech warrior does not know that the other aspect of free speech besides speaking freely is being able to choose whom to listen to! Does he think free speech means being forced to listen to specific people speak?

Surprised. Pikachu. Face.

Eh, he’s used to that.

Ah, simpler times. Why do I wanna play Pokemon Go now?

it’s

Aw, you made a typo. That’s two more days of memes.