This guy is a LinkedIn comedian.

Why else would anyone be on LinkedIn?

I would like to sit naked in a bog, eating leaves, and sleep in a tree dreaming of nothing at all.

I mean, go and do that now then.

You may not want to hear this but if this describes you it simply means you’re an uninteresting person.

It’s great for the first few weeks , maybe a month or two.

I graduated in September, job searched through December, finally signed a contract, but I don’t start until April. I am counting down the fucking days, my dude.

Supposing an invasion does happen, to address the question of what you can do, just look at America’s losing streak of wars that has been ongoing for 50+ years.

Make a waist mounted version: Steam Dick.

Yeah like, I have a very good friend who is in Argentina and I care a lot about the country as a result. I’d love to visit someday…

That would be the 鳥人間コンテスト！ Held every year!

最初はお前の冗談が分からなかったが、理解した瞬間に笑わずにはいられなかった。

Oh geez, mine came back and back and back and while it has been about a decade since then, the last operation (which I guess was the one that worked) ended up with my ass looking like someone just carved a hunk out of the living flesh with an ice-cream scoop.

Been there, done that. Hope you’ve recovered.